Seismic Sounds Hillebrity of The Month: Jackie Hell
Jackie Hell has pretty much owned “The Freak Scene” on Capitol Hill area for years, and she’s given the people who need to express themselves the safe places to do that. She has created and thrown some of the most outrageous shows on Capitol Hill such as Pho Bang and the newest feast for the eyes “SNACKHOLE”. Not to mention sh-he’s the brains behind the beautiful mess known as Jackie And The Control Tops, which was the over the top punk sensation; releasing singles such as “Expensive” and “Tonight I Kill” on Dirtnap Records. The fact of the matter is you may have seen her holding court on the hill in all off her glory, but if you haven’t yet experienced a Jackie Hell shin-dig, then you ain’t shit. You need to check it out!!!!
Favorite Capitol Hill watering hole?
The Crescent Lounge! It is the epitome of high-class! It’s a place where Counts and Dukes go to meet ladies of the night!
You remember your best night of debauchery on the hill? What ensued?
Sometime back in the late nineties, I was going up to meet a friend before performing at Aerospace (now Neumos). I was walking up East Pike (in broad daylight) looking like Liz Taylor on crack, and this young black guy gave me a really confused look as I passed him. I looked back and he was following me, so I started to get a bit concerned. As I crossed 12th Ave, I looked back and he was getting closer. I got to my friends door and started pounding! I thought I was about to get mugged! I looked to the right, and there he was, holding his hard cock! (he still looked confused) So, I grabbed him by his dick and led him to the nearest parking lot, saying: “come on, mama will take care of you..” Afterwards I had to fix my lipstick, I was a mess!
Your make-up is brilliant..who inspired you?
When I first started doing drag, I was totally into Anita Berber (a 1920’s burlesque dancer from Berlin) So my make-up was very much like hers. Over the years I’ve developed bags under the eyes, added more rouge, you know, made it look more classy.
Is there a Capitol Hill Employee you would like to go down on?
That door girl at the Cha Cha with the long black hair (I think her name is Victoria?)
What drives you fuckin batty about people when you’re out?
When those goddamn blond bitches from the eastside have to get up there and sing “Loveshack” and they’re so drunk, is all they can do is laugh! It makes me want to kill!!!
What is Jackie Hell listening to music wise these days?
Gangster hip hop
Who is Jackie Hell by day?
An apartment manager. Anyone looking for an apartment?
If you could change one thing about the Hill, what would it be?
We need more freaks!
Genital warts or Herpes simplex 1?
Herpes
Drink of choice?
My own of course! “Black Diamonds” (vodka & coke).
What do you think of granny porn?
It’s an alright career, but I’m getting a little tired of it.
Next Jackie Hell soiree??
Seismic-Sound 
I think I love he/r.
A-MA-ZING!